When I was younger I thought that the only way to be successful in life is to convince other people of my greatness, talent, and worth.

It doesn’t matter if we are talking about career, love, or even friendships. I was convinced that unless other people thought highly of me -unless I pleased everyone- I would never be successful or happy. Sound familiar?

Here is the problem: no matter how hard I worked, how good my grades were, how much attention I got from potential boyfriends, how often I made it to the gym, I never actually felt full or satisfied. Nothing ever felt enough and even if I reached a milestone, I had this underlying anxiety about my next step, desperately hoping I could hold up whatever standard I had created.

I was constantly looking at my own life from the eyes of external observers and judgers rather than from my own intuition and my own desires in life.

It was exhausting.

This perpetual -& broken!- cycle of seeking external validation to create internal fulfillment is what -I am convinced- led to my lower back pain in 2008, which didn’t resolve until I changed my life from the inside out and fostered a close and trusting relationship with myself.

You see, your body is never actually trying to cause you pain… it is, in fact, trying to heal you and sometimes it’s forced to use pain to get your attention and make you see the things you are doing that are leading you further from your truth and your happiness.

So, the most precious gift you can give to yourself is hands down, being true to yourself.

What does being to TRUE TO YOURSELF mean?

1. means giving yourself the time and space and permission to FEEL your own emotions fully. The good ones and the dark ones.

2. It means speaking and acting from a place of self-integrity. Do you change what you think and believe every 2 minutes based on who you are talking to, or do you stand by your opinions, thoughts and feelings comfortably and genuinely. In other words, are you comfortable with being unique and your own person or do you feel threatened in your worth if you disagree with someone?

3. It means understanding, utilizing, and optimizing your strengths so you can act from a place of personal power, confidence, and positive drive. So many people get caught up in perfectionism which only leads them to spend all their energy on trying to eradicate and cover up their weaknesses… they forget about their strengths as a result and will always play catch-up.

4. It means creating opportunities for yourself that you actually want to take (not the ones your family, partner, or society expect of you!). This also means that you use your creativity and originality to find and develop connections, adventures, and surprises in your life.

5. It means talking to yourself kindly, genuinely, and with a sense of humor (C’mon, can you laugh at yourself?:)). Our reality is a direct result of the thoughts and beliefs we have about ourselves. If you walk through life thinking downer-thoughts like “I am not good enough” or “I will never find love” that is what you are manifesting. Alternatively, think about how your life -your daily decisions- would be different if you were guided by this idea: “My life wants to be beautiful and I will do all I can to bring out my bright, beautiful, and passionate side. If I am true to myself, everything will fall into place.”

I guarantee that retraining your focus on being true to yourself front and foremost, will change your life drastically.

Your are in charge of your own life and you have the power to transform it.

In the comments below, I’d love to hear from you: Which one of these 5 points most resonates with you? Do you have any other additional tips for how to be true to yourself?

If you want to dive deeper into the magic of Manifestation & Vision Boarding this fall, join me and 9 other women for my in-person workshop in NYC on Sat., Nov. 15th. In this intimate, magical, and playful gathering, I will share my top manifestation tools to help you create the vibrant, love-filled life you want. Only 6 spots left -get yours here.

Super bummed you are not in NYC? Email Caroline@carolinezwick.com and let me know. Depending on demand, I might offer an online course for manifestation and vision boarding.

XO,