In my years as a coach -and as a woman myself, of course- I have observed one particular mistake that women no matter where make that leads to a cascade of other issues; anything from small bummer moments to massive dissatisfaction.
Can you guess what it is?
It is self-rejection.
Let me explain: Many of us are so afraid that they will be rejected, criticized, or doubted by others that they reject themselves before anyone else can.
They don't speak up even if they have brilliant, funny ideas.
They hesitate to ask for what they want and deserve.
They downplay their achievements.
They don't set boundaries that are necessary in order for themselves to feel good.
They sacrifice self-care in order to take care of others first.
They feel guilty all the time.
They are deathly afraid of seeming selfish, arrogant, or stupid.
They deny themselves the very things they celebrate in their best friends.
They dim their own light.
So let me tell you: Being invisible isn't cute! You playing small doesn't serve anyone! The more you give yourself permission to shine, to speak about your ideas with excitement and enthusiasm, so walk proudly on your two beautiful legs, and so use your voice in a way that enriches conversation and triggers a deeper inquiry, the more you are giving permission to other to do the same.
So, today (and tomorrow and the next day!) make it your goal to step up and be YOU, the proud, confident, shining you that is just waiting to emerge. Ditch the critical, negative, and self-limiting voice in your head that is telling you to hold back your own brilliance.
Life is too short, love!