We all know that feeling insecure sucks.

I can barely think of anything that feels worse than that clump in your chest that says "I am not enough," "I am not measuring up (to whatever standard I self-invented)," "I should just go and hide before anyone sees my deficiencies."

Yuck. Not fun.

Because insecurities are so vast in a society that has perfection as it's sole goal, so many people try to "beat" their "embarrassing" insecurities that are responsible for everything that is wrong in their lives.

However, here is a truth I want you to know: you cannot BEAT insecurity.

If you try to force it out, your are only going further into denial and thus, create a deep split within yourself. You are trying to destroy something that is very real for you by applying hate, avoidance, pressure, and force. While you may be able to do this for a short while, it, in fact, only creates jealousy and envy of others.

And we all know that jealousy and envy feels just as bad as the insecurity itself (with the exception that now you are focusing your inner negativity and disdain on someone else... which is not the way to make the world a more beautiful place for you, trust me).

Here is how to deal with your insecurities gracefully, kindly and with elegance:

acknowledge that you feel insecure about something (doesn't matter if it's a body part or a skill) and rediscover the love you have for yourself despite your imperfection.

Yes, you've got to go back to the root and S.T.O.P. expecting perfection from yourself.

Refocus your mind and your eye on the things that are beautiful, bright, and amazing about yourself.

Give yourself permission to dwell in your imperfection and know that the world has amazing things in store for you even though you may not have Gisele's legs and Anna Wintour's resumé.

Perfection is the greatest illusion of our time and the main reason people feel such massive and debilitating insecurities.

So, do yourself the kindest, most graceful and elegant favor and use this mantra next time you feel insecure:

"I feel insecurity about __________ and that is ok. It doesn't govern my life and it doesn't determine my worthiness. I give myself permission to release this feeling, love myself despite my imperfections and move on with building a beautiful, fun life for myself and those I love."

Sending you tons of love!

Warmly,

Caroline